I am crying.
Crying and sobbing at the same time while reading my 3 year old blog post (Experiences Are The Best Teacher) with our ‘wedding first walk’ Thai song as the background music – I have no idea what is the name of this Thai song but it is my top favourite song for now.
I am touched. I am happy. I am enlighten by what life has for me in these 3 years (and more). Reading and looking at my past through what I had written and posted made me emotional. Have I been this far? The first quote of the post that triggered my emotion:
“I begged Him to lead me to the road of happiness where I can find my cheerful smiles again. I was tired of driving in the round-about again, and again and I want to get out of there. Also, I pray that God will heal my broken heart, allowing me to give and take love again when I’m ready. I pray that I’ll be guided to my true love, someone who suit me best, deserves me and will treat me rightly and faithfully”.
I don’t know why I get so emotional by just reading my own writing. I guess, life has taught me so much and each lesson is so meaningful to me. I admitted that it is not easy to face and cure a broken heart. It is a daunting task. It was hard to face the day and night once the heart had been betrayed, but I am glad that I have grown stronger and happier day by day.
Because, I am blessed with a loving family – my parents whom have become my biggest support system in term of physically, mentally, emotionally and financially although sometimes, they will against my will due to different perspective. Despite of all, I know they care and love me so much that they are worried if I will fall and hurt myself.
Because, I am blessed with a bunch of lovely buddies whom always care and support each other. All of us are busy with our personal life and career, but we always try our best to contact and reach to each other. Life now get much easier with FB and Whatsapp
His and mine buddies = Ours
Remember how I used to call them my angels?
“Besides, I realize I am one lucky soul who is blessed with a bunch of beautiful angels. They are always right by my side through thick and thin, including my family and closed friends. I feel touched each time I received help or even a small wishes, prayer, hug or a simple hello as each of them mean so much to me. I guess, this is a valuable treasure that money can’t buy”.
Because, I am blessed with the career which I have gotten myself into by being a Teach For Malaysia fellow (first cohort). There, I have known and made closed bonds with a group of 48 fellows and a strong staff team. I have grown and developed professionally as a fellow and adding in valuable lesson into my personal growth. In these 2 years, I have learned so much from each fellow whom I have come across and now, we are as closed a family.
Because, I am blessed to have taught these lovely 400+ kids in 2 years time. They are a 13-14 year old kids but they too, have taught me uncountable life lessons that have shaped me into being a better individual. I am truly touched and thankful for these kids (I miss them again.. )
Because of all, I am blessed to have found a man who loves and appreciates me for who I am. I am touched by his effort to always be his best and relentlessly contributes to the relationship. Often, he is willing to compromise his needs just to fulfil mine. He respects and loves my parents because he knows they are my strongest support. He puts in efforts in knowing my closed buddies because they know I treasured them much (even made them involved in the proposal and wedding plans – twice!). He tried his best to understand my uncommon career path and gives me unconditional support despite that he thinks I am better off somewhere but TFM as a teacher. He even tried to make time to visit my workplace and students so that he could understand and support me better. Not to mention to all the preparation he had done for the proposal and our wedding.
The proposal <3
Calv and his ‘business lesson’
A surprise from him~
TFM family and us
What else can I ask for? T__________T
What have I done in my late life?
Having Calv in my life has encouraged me to be my better version. He has taught me the meaning of love and how to love him and people around me more. Not perfect but I am learning each day.
I believe, I am emotional because I am thankful for the people I have in my life. I am emotional because I am grateful for the choices that I had made. I am emotional because my life is blessed with all the loving people and opportunities that come across. I am emotional because I can now celebrate for whoever I am today.
2012-2013 have been an amazing years because of all these people, the loves and the opportunities given. It is already 19th December 2013 and it is great to reflect on what I have done throughout the years.
Oh.. and thank you too Blogger for still keeping my blog although I am no longer active in blogging (I know, Calv is going to laugh at me again ). I do think that it is good to keep this hobby not for fame but for personal reflection and to record my gratefulness to people around me.
Thank you for all the amazing experiences. I will be back again, dear bloggie.