19 December 2013

What Life Has For Me

 

I am crying.

Crying and sobbing at the same time while reading my 3 year old blog post (Experiences Are The Best Teacher) with our ‘wedding first walk’ Thai song as the background music – I have no idea what is the name of this Thai song but it is my top favourite song for now.

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I am touched. I am happy. I am enlighten by what life has for me in these 3 years (and more). Reading and looking at my past through what I had written and posted made me emotional. Have I been this far? The first quote of the post that triggered my emotion:

“I begged Him to lead me to the road of happiness where I can find my cheerful smiles again. I was tired of driving in the round-about again, and again and I want to get out of there. Also, I pray that God will heal my broken heart, allowing me to give and take love again when I’m ready. I pray that I’ll be guided to my true love, someone who suit me best, deserves me and will treat me rightly and faithfully”.



I don’t know why I get so emotional by just reading my own writing. I guess, life has taught me so much and each lesson is so meaningful to me. I admitted that it is not easy to face and cure a broken heart. It is a daunting task. It was hard to face the day and night once the heart had been betrayed, but I am glad that I have grown stronger and happier day by day.


Because, I am blessed with a loving family – my parents whom have become my biggest support system in term of physically, mentally, emotionally and financially although sometimes, they will against my will due to different perspective. Despite of all, I know they care and love me so much that they are worried if I will fall and hurt myself.

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Because, I am blessed with a bunch of lovely buddies whom always care and support each other. All of us are busy with our personal life and career, but we always try our best to contact and reach to each other. Life now get much easier with FB and Whatsapp Smile

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His and mine buddies = Ours Winking smile

Remember how I used to call them my angels?

“Besides, I realize I am one lucky soul who is blessed with a bunch of beautiful angels. They are always right by my side through thick and thin, including my family and closed friends. I feel touched each time I received help or even a small wishes, prayer, hug or a simple hello as each of them mean so much to me. I guess, this is a valuable treasure that money can’t buy”.

 

Because, I am blessed with the career which I have gotten myself into by being a Teach For Malaysia fellow (first cohort). There, I have known and made closed bonds with a group of 48 fellows and a strong staff team. I have grown and developed professionally as a fellow and adding in valuable lesson into my personal growth. In these 2 years, I have learned so much from each fellow whom I have come across and now, we are as closed a family.

 

TFM

Because, I am blessed to have taught these lovely 400+ kids in 2 years time. They are a 13-14 year old kids but they too, have taught me uncountable life lessons that have shaped me into being a better individual. I am truly touched and thankful for these kids (I miss them again.. Crying face)

 

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Because of all, I am blessed to have found a man who loves and appreciates me for who I am. I am touched by his effort to always be his best and relentlessly contributes to the relationship. Often, he is willing to compromise his needs just to fulfil mine. He respects and loves my parents because he knows they are my strongest support. He puts in efforts in knowing my closed buddies because they know I treasured them much (even made them involved in the proposal and wedding plans – twice!). He tried his best to understand my uncommon career path and gives me unconditional support despite that he thinks I am better off somewhere but TFM as a teacher. He even tried to make time to visit my workplace and students so that he could understand and support me better. Not to mention to all the preparation he had done for the proposal and our wedding.

 

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The proposal <3

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Calv and his ‘business lesson’ Smile

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A surprise from him~

 

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TFM family and us Smile

 

What else can I ask for? T__________T
What have I done in my late life?
Crying face Crying face Crying face Crying face Crying face 


Having Calv in my life has encouraged me to be my better version. He has taught me the meaning of love and how to love him and people around me more. Not perfect but I am learning each day.

I believe, I am emotional because I am thankful for the people I have in my life. I am emotional because I am grateful for the choices that I had made. I am emotional because my life is blessed with all the loving people and opportunities that come across. I am emotional because I can now celebrate for whoever I am today.


2012-2013 have been an amazing years because of all these people, the loves and the opportunities given. It is already 19th December 2013 and it is great to reflect on what I have done throughout the years.

Oh.. and thank you too Blogger for still keeping my blog although I am no longer active in blogging (I know, Calv is going to laugh at me again Sad smile ). I do think that it is good to keep this hobby not for fame but for personal reflection and to record my gratefulness to people around me.

Thank you for all the amazing experiences. I will be back again, dear bloggie.

07 August 2013

Stalked By A Life-Time Lover

 

My blog, yes this curryegg’s blog has sadly turned into an abandoned blog since 2 years ago. There is no proper answer for the disappearance of the owner as she is still as passionate as before in writing, as adventurous as before in experiencing life and as reflective as before in understanding life and herself as an individual.

 

Now that she is preparing to move on to another stage with her hubby, Calv and in the meantime ending her 2nd year of fellowship with Teach For Malaysia, there should be abundance of stories to be shared. However, this author seems to be stuck somewhere and it is unexplainable.. It seems like she is happy to be a hermit at the moment. haiz.. Sad smile

 

While this author is pretending not owning any blog, just a normal person who read other blogs (yes, i do that often. maybe i read yours too?), her *official hubby goes extra miles by often popping up a few weird phrases in nowhere.

 

Phrases like:

Are you reading Mr. Bean Holiday? Are you reading Mr. Bean Holiday?”
You already loved panda even before we met. Now you are owning a real panda in front of you, happy or not?”
”A postman called you Curry Egg before right when he delivered you the parcel?”
I know you are not Megan Fox. You are Curry Egg”.
.

.

.
and so on and forth
.

.

.

My *official hubby will never fail to end his conversation with this:
”I think my prediction on the fall of your blog will come true again. I am going to hack your blog account end of the year and post a big note stating that curryegg’s blog posts have gone down again after meeting me. Muahahaha….”

 

 

O_o!!!

 

Like seriously?
Why I couldn’t even recall what he was mentioning?
When he claimed that these are quoted from my blog and he even toured me around my blog’s achieve, i tell you… my eyes and mouth were widely opened in disbelief!

 

I was surprised by how details he can be and took note with nearly everything I posted here although I no longer as active as before. At the same time, I feel bad because he has been waiting for my return with reflective and ‘me’ posts.

 

I don’t know when my activeness in blogging will be turned on again. I don’t know if could write as interesting as before. I don’t know if there is any blog reader who wants to read my blog. But one thing for sure, is that my life-time lover will always stalk and read my blog despite of my inactiveness.

 

Thanks dear for loving me whole-heartedly by constantly taking the effort to understand my past and deliver your discovery to the present so that we can laugh together. You have motivated me to be our very own writer that savour each and every moment together (or individually). I am blessed to have a life-time stalker like you.. LOL.. =P

 

Thank you and I want to be back here again to prove your prediction wrong.

 

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He is the keeper. Cheers to my life-time stalker lover <3

 

P/s: Why *official husband? Just for the sake of fun in highlighting the ‘official’ word as we just signed the paper a month ago Winking smile

28 July 2013

The Unknown


A time to be alone seems to be a wise thing to do. An unknown situation had happened. I have been sitting here at a cafe, being surrounded by the crowds, trying to calm myself down and reflected on the unknown. Still, I couldn't figure out what is the root cause.



I tried to release my stress on my sketchbook. However, I stopped half way, not knowing what to be drawn anymore. Then, I shifted to reading but after 4-5 pages, my mind couldn't seem to focus anymore.



The unknown seems to be scary as it eats up my emotion and creates more worries. I am scared. I am sad. I am worried. In the meantime, I know sitting here and doing nothing couldn't help.

I am obviously lost but still, hopeful that the unknown will be clarified or at least be understood, and then be translated into love.

I am hopeful. I am wishful. I am prayerful, to discover the unknown, and allows it to connect us again.






23 June 2013

The Ending Of The Final Chapter

Hi guys!

How are you all lately? Finally, I have taken the guard to come back to my quiet space and update myself. I have a news here!

I am getting married in another 9 days!
OMG!!!!

I still couldn't believe it. I mean, I couldn't believe that I am marrying Calv after years of dating. Of course, I am happy and excited because I am marrying to my soulmate. One thing which I am pretty aware of - my singlehood is going to end in another few days!

Another round of OMG!!!!

I am grateful and thankful for the journey which I have been through with Calv and I pray that we will be blessed with a loving and happy marriage together as a couple, a spouse, a teamplayer, a business partner (emm.. what type of business?), a parents, a family or... probably just as simple as 'you and me'.

In the meantime, I would like to thank to all my readers who have been following my chapters of life between year 2007 till now despite of my frequent disappearance. Often, I curved a secret smile on my face when I am thinking of some funny comments from you, or feeling touched remembering the warm support from you, or pushing myself to stand firm on my two feet while enduring a hard moment after recalling a harsh but true comments from some of you. Although it has been years and my Disqus comment system had eaten all the old comments *mourn*, you guys are still in my mind.

Hence, I would love to share this moment with you - a moment where the bride-to-be is excited with 'double-hood', nervous with the future has for her, happy to love and be loved and thankful with whatever she has right now before moving into a new book (well, not just a new chapter anymore). Let us cheers this moment with a smile.

Thank you and I love you <3>





08 May 2013

Dancing In A Storm

I am affected with our local political news lately.
So much of negativity, racism, bias and harsh. I could feel that I am stressed out not just because of my personal tasks, but with all the issues which are happening around me.


I care for my nieces and nephews.
I care for my future children.
I care for my students.
I care for my family.
I care for my nation.
I care for our future.

 

Because I care too much, this is why I am affected and somewhere close to being depressed. Part of me worried if the sun is not showing itself any sooner. Will the rain water drown us all?

 

Well, all I want now is to….


dancing

Photo credit to Calv.

 

Dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth - William W. Purkey

 

May us be blessed with all the love and happiness around. Thank you God.