This Is How We Communicate

It is nearly 2 years since I am married to Calv.
Wait.. let me count again.. yes. 2 years.

Up till now, I still feel it is a miracle to me on how this relationship begin and develop. Sometimes, when I wake up in the morning next to this man, I will look at him, smile and think to myself, "How lucky I am to be married to him". Well, I don't normally tell him this although I know that being verbally expressive means more in a marriage. I (and maybe him) prefer to write or give quiet hugs more. Or I like being cheeky to him as part of the expression? Haha...  =P

Today, out of the blue, I asked him through Line messenger, "Among all the *choices out there, why do you choose me?"

And he replied, "Cause I mis-chose? Oh!!! Cause the day was dark and I cannot see properly?"

=__=

Then, later in the evening he posted this:





Haha.. I do appreciate his sense of humor and unique way of motivating me.
I guess, he knows me very well that my grit to start something is high but to maintain the progress is questionable. Well, I don't want to blame my typology as an ENFP but part of it... is true. So, he is trying a harsher strategy to motivate me instead of being nice (I still hope you are nice to me k?)

That's how we usually communicate to each other. Annoying but loving at the same time. It somehow reminds me of my relationship with my dad. My dad like to tease and joke too in similar way. Now, it makes me wonder on what people say, 'the daughter will find a partner who is similar to their dad's characteristics'. Then, I wonder, will my child find someone in the future who is either like the dad or me?

Haha... it is funny to think that way.

Photo taken in Hawaii, Feb 2015.

I miss Calv and I hope the reunion time will come fast so that we can kacau each other again.

How Love Changes A Person - Me

Calv and I had just ended our conversation through Facebook call before I decided to make a quick blog post over something that comes very spontaneous to me.

Photo taken at one of our favorite islands in Thailand.

Well, it is not that spontaneous after all when I have been thinking about this person for such a great, long time. The image, the voice, the warmth, the fun, the happiness and the joy that this person brings me since day one is unbelievably addictive.


Although we are in a distance relationship (and now marriage), my emotions and thoughts seemed to evolve around him. You might be surprised of why I become so sentimental in this post. I shall not question and I shall not hide my feelings for what I have been greatly affected by all his loves, cares, supports and efforts all these while.

I feel safe and secure for I know that I will be guided and supported.

I notice that I have learned and grown so much ever since I know this person. This thought begins from a conversation that I had with my manager in this very afternoon. I have discovered that I am more organized and practical to my work. Besides that, I can be straight and directive in my conversation with good intention behind. Despite of the few values that I discovered, I also realized that I am more confident and being more acceptance of who I am before and now.

The gift.

Reasons for my growth and development are believed to be built through my inner strengths openness to learn from experiences, high achieving working environment, people around me and of course, from the loves that I have been blessed… *thank you* 

The unexpected joyous moment.

Life is full of unpredictable challenges and I do have my down moments. My bed is not always full with beautiful and scented flowers. However, I am braver in facing upcoming challenges. I am happier in awaiting for tomorrows. I am hopeful to achieve shared and personal dreams.


Eh eh…. why I can see clouds and hear birds chirping around me? *dream*

Today, I even made a silly promise to my manager to keep me accountable with one action item. I do not plan to share it here yet, but this promise is made out of 2 reasons:

1) To achieve the dream that I have always wanted to accomplish
2) For love.

I even asked her to give me consequence (which I suggested).
If I don’t do X, I will buy magnum ice-cream for all the ‘failure’ I make throughout the year. Seem challenging uh? Oh well…. ‘Golden mouth has just spoken out’.. The promise must go on~

Thank God for all the guidance and loves that you have shown me. Please, continue to guide and bless me with the ability to love, patience, wisdom and joy so that I can share with my loved one, my husband.

Good night <3

P/s: To you who are still waiting for your right one, I pray and hope that you will find him/her soon and receive the loves and joys that you wish for <3

The Ending Of The Final Chapter

Hi guys!

How are you all lately? Finally, I have taken the guard to come back to my quiet space and update myself. I have a news here!

I am getting married in another 9 days!
OMG!!!!

I still couldn't believe it. I mean, I couldn't believe that I am marrying Calv after years of dating. Of course, I am happy and excited because I am marrying to my soulmate. One thing which I am pretty aware of - my singlehood is going to end in another few days!

Another round of OMG!!!!

I am grateful and thankful for the journey which I have been through with Calv and I pray that we will be blessed with a loving and happy marriage together as a couple, a spouse, a teamplayer, a business partner (emm.. what type of business?), a parents, a family or... probably just as simple as 'you and me'.

In the meantime, I would like to thank to all my readers who have been following my chapters of life between year 2007 till now despite of my frequent disappearance. Often, I curved a secret smile on my face when I am thinking of some funny comments from you, or feeling touched remembering the warm support from you, or pushing myself to stand firm on my two feet while enduring a hard moment after recalling a harsh but true comments from some of you. Although it has been years and my Disqus comment system had eaten all the old comments *mourn*, you guys are still in my mind.

Hence, I would love to share this moment with you - a moment where the bride-to-be is excited with 'double-hood', nervous with the future has for her, happy to love and be loved and thankful with whatever she has right now before moving into a new book (well, not just a new chapter anymore). Let us cheers this moment with a smile.

Thank you and I love you <3>

My 12.12.12 Proposal Video

Probably some of you are not aware that I am being proposed on the 12.12.2012!!!
Although it has been 1.5 month, I seriously still couldn’t believe it!

Oh my!

While typing this out, the ring is clinging on my right finger. Well, I hardly wear ring since childhood (except those that are made using straw and flower stem). So, it still creates the unfamiliar experience whenever I wear it. By the way, I don’t wear the ring often because I am worried that constant use of whiteboard marker at school and my clumsiness will spoil the ring. I am not a good care-taker so this time, I am determined to be one, for the sake of the ring which symbolized his love.

 

I have always intended to write a full long post on the proposal. However time doesn’t seem like wanting to be my friend lately. Well, it is ok because there is a videoclip created by one of my friends, Steve that recorded the moments.

 

 

Till now, my cheeks will still turn red whenever I watch or recall the moment.
Shocking. Drama. Loving. Precious.

 

To some of you who do not understand Mandarin, it might be difficult for you because all the actor and actresses conversed in Mandarin.


Again, thank you to those who participated and contributed in my very special proposal day. Thank you for your love, care and blessing ♥

Inspired By FB For Making A 2012 Review

I had written my 2012 Review for almost a week in Facebook and I think it is best that I just CTLR+C and CTRL+V here. It is the beautiful memories that I wanted to share with even if you are not in my Facebook ;)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

2012 has been an amazing year. Never had I thought that it will end so quickly! What had happened yesterday was like a dream, so beautiful and meaningful.

There are so many 'first times' I encountered throughout the year 2012:

- First time having my own room
- First time being a teacher
- First time helping Calv in house moving
- First time being a DSLR user
- First time receiving salary
- First time treating my parents on expensive restaurant
- First time making doodle notes
- First time cooking for Calv Seet
- First time owning a Bamboo device!!!
- First time being crazy over Instagram (Follow me @curryegg !)
- First time having an iphone as present
- First time meeting a long-lost childhood n NS friend
- First time squeezing out all my creative juice for creative assignment.
- First time seeing my students’ drastic achievement in academic and attitude
- First time buying 24 books in a month!
- First time paying for my passport.
- First time having birdies photography session
- First time flying to oversea with Calv

Me and my TFM collabs in our traditional attire.

One of the activities that my students enjoyed the most ;)

My DSLR and I!

Sorry. Not Halal. By the way, this picture was ‘stole’ from his photo album =P

That is the exact reaction when I unwrap the present and saw the word, “BAMBOO!”

Birdies + Baby panda!

My pancake at Samed Island, Thailand~

Of course, there are other down 'First time' such as:

- First time crying in front of the students
- First time being so lost and down
- First time not blogging for 100 days!


Well, I am thankful that my good 'First times' are higher than the opposite one ;)

Of course, not to forget my highlighted first time:
- Being *cheated by a bunch of friends and relatives because of Calv.
- Being proposed under such an unpredicted circumstances
- Being hold by a ring
- Owning a custom-made diamond ring
- Having face so red and warm throughout the week!

 

Oopss.. Ok. Pretend that you have not read and seen this picture so that I can tell you more in details by continuing my Love Story Part 3.

Oh... and first time receiving so many blessing and like from you guys in FB! Thank you.

2012 was indeed an adventurous and eventful year that i will never ever forgotten. Thank you for the year and I am ready to jump on my new 2013 chapter. I know that it will be my legendary year and I shall reveal the reason day by day, till I do my another end of year reflection again.


Happy New Year and let's turn our 2013 as our canvas and be an artist to paint the way we want it to be!

***

Special thanks to:
My parents, Calv's family, my best buddies, TFM friends, LDOs, principles, teachers, students, students' parents, blog readers and you. You guys have played an important role in my life. Of course, you.. my dear Calvin. Love you all ♥

A Happy 25th Birthday.

Well, I think my blogpost title should be written as ‘An Awesome 25th Birthday’ instead of using only the ‘happy’ word because, I did have an awesome one! ;)

A couple of weeks ago, I have ‘upgraded’ my age with new number. Till now, I still couldn’t believe that how fast time has past and I am back into square one again, embarking another historical journey of my life. Isn’t it miraculous? It creates a feeling of reborn that inspire me to start all over again to make my new age more meaningful and purposeful.

And, it is a great start by receiving this unexpected gift from Calv, a day before the actual date.

OMG!!!

I couldn’t believe my eyes when I see this!!?
Calvin Seet drew another masterpiece and this time on my present paper??

 

 

Isn’t it unique and lovely?!!


I admire and fall in love with his creativity and sincerity though it is a combination of 8 pieces of A4 (new and recycled) papers with cellophane tape sticking them together.

 

Initially, he was worried that I would be unhappy because he didn’t wrap the present traditionally with proper present paper. Well, seriously  I love this more than commercialized present paper because artwork means sincerity, sincerity means love, isn’t it?

What had raced my heart even more is THIS:
*pointing at the following photo of mine*

 

OH MY GOD!!!

It’s a Bamboo!!! OMG!!!


I couldn’t believe it even till now that I have a BAMBOO!!! It’s a drawing tablet for art-lover. Google if you want to find out more about it as I could sense that some of you are feeling weird that it doesn’t turn out a bamboo tree but, a flat black device. Lol…

 

I love Calv’s thoughtful present so much. He knew I love drawing, sketching and doodling. Throughout the year, he has observed my interest and passion in sharing my art with family members, friends and blog readers online. Besides, he always heard that I made art stuff as teaching material for my students. With the hope to expand my creativity and bring my passion into a higher level, he did some researches before buying this tablet.

 

Here are some of my latest masterpieces in my purple journal (I named it my purple journal because the skin is purple!).

A doodle that I did inspired by the Teach For Malaysia’s Mission at the back of my name card.

Discovered my niece’s photo album with fairy theme. It has reminded me of my childhood, thus I sketched it in the book.

 

I always feel loved and lucky to have such a considerate, loving and caring partner. The moment when he told me that he had actually prepared my birthday present a week earlier before his flight has melted my heart. He was worried if flight delay happened, he might be late to give it to me.. *touched*

 

Well, I couldn’t ask more from him as he has always given his best, all the time to make me happy, including this precious dinner at Umaiyah on my actual date.

 

Japanese food is rarely his favorite because he dislikes raw food (like salmon sashimi. how can!? so nice right?) and seaweed. Despite of his personal disinterest, he still took the effort to smile and forcefully said,

“Let’s go for Japanese food. I loooooovee Japanese food”.

Lol…
Well, little things like this matter most to me. Probably to most of the girls too.

 

With my favorite bouquet of roses in my hand while wearing my new hot red dress, my birthday ended awesomely. Of course, the night wouldn’t be perfect without my charming partner ;)

Thank you dear for creating me such a memorable and sweet birthday. I know, it will be a good start of the year for me. May God always blessed you with good health, wealth, loves and wisdom. I love you!

 

In the meantime, please look forward to my new creation using Bamboo ;)
A-W-E-S-O-M-E-S-A-U-S-E!!!!!

A Love Story of Mine [Part 2]

Continued from [Part 1]

I found myself cuddled my booster tightly before the sunray dominating my body, as a sign of ‘hey-it’s-almost-1pm-and-you-should-wake-up!’.

 

The morning was cold because of the rain that poured heavily before dawn. The weather was just nice to continue another hours of sleep – but I didn’t.

 

I was still affected with yesterday incident – very much indeed.

 

It took me a full 12-hours to digest what had actually happened last night, when Calv re-confessed his feeling to me after the Bumbu Bali dinner. I still remembered how both of us were sitting quietly in his car, with no background music but could track my heartbeats sound, very close to my apartment under the bright moon.

 

I could feel my furious heartbeats and burning cheeks when Calv expressed his feeling and intention gently with such a phrase, “Kelly, I realized I like you and wonder if you could give me a chance and consider me?”

 

It was somehow funny to listen to his old-fashioned way of confession – very polite, structural and gentlemen, like watching the oldies movie. But then, it was part of the bonuses on the process of unlocking my heart. However, the funny thing was, I rejected him by saying, “Yes, I will consider”. In an instant, he politely replied in a business-like-manner, “Ok. Thank you for considering” and drove away after dropping me home safely.

 

That was how my night ended with a bouquet of roses I brought back home with sweet smile curving on my face, yet tense because I need to come up with a decision.

 

Note: Mum was surprised to see the flowers. She admired the flowers and teased dad for not buying her anything big like this in their almost-30-years-of-marriage. Dad ended up ;hating’ and blaming Calv (he hadn’t seen him) for buying me such a big bouquet of flowers because it made him look bad =P

 

While still lying on the bed, in that chilling morning, I murmured to myself, “Should I or shouldn’t I? Accept or not accept? Be in a relationship or continue single? Calvin or not Calvin?”.

 

These were the questions I frequently threw onto myself ever since the last date with Calv. Well, I knew I like him but I am not sure whether am I ready for a new relationship. The roller-coaster ride of emotion from my previous 4 years relationship failure  had hit me hard from the inside. My ex’s unfaithfulness had greatly affected my trust on guy and the possibility of building a long-term relationship. (Well, I didn’t share much of this chapter of mine as I think, it is not worth giving attention on).

 

However, I believe in God that he loves me and he must have a better plan awaiting me somewhere in the future. All I have to do is to mend the broken heart, enjoy my life to the fullest, improve myself, receive God’s love and trust his plans for me and my future partner – because I know, there must be someone who will love and appreciate me with all his heart – my another half.

 

So, is Calvin The One?
Is he whom God has prepared for me?
Are we compatible?

 

The dilemma continued throughout the day and week before he asked me out again. This time, he invited me to an event at a club named, The Roots organized by one of his friends, Nigel Sparks (MC) to celebrate his company, Negative’s first year anniversary. 

  

This time, I invited my 2 close friends and had an amazing time together. That night, spending with Calv and my friends did draw my bond closer to him. It has allowed me to see another side of him – friendly, funky and funny.

 

He did introduce me to his friends during in the event. When I was not noticing, he secretly replied to his friends when they asked which one is his gf, “Not yet but I hope the short hair in white shirt will be mine someday”.

 

 

Though the place was filled with loud music and people’s conversations, I could still hear his reply. That immediately made me blush. Like real blush… >.<

 

We joked, danced and drank throughout the whole event. It was funny to see him dancing – like a penguin maybe? Lol..

 

There was a time, after the event where he hold my hand when he found me dangerously crossing the road. I was on alcohol effect because the bartender continuously offered free-flow of coke+vodka  whisky at the event. It was my first time taking vodka and yes.. I was 45% drunk?

 

Well, the drunk-part is not important. What is more important is that.. HE HOLD MY HAND AND CROSSED THE STREET is a bigger alarm bell. Although I was 45% drunk, I could still feel the warmth of his hand and my fast beating heart-beat.

 

Secretly, I hope the moment could freeze a little longer so that he could continue holding my hand while both of my friends where watching from behind. “Are they smiling at us? Or are they shocked?”. I could no longer pay attention anymore.

 

Am I in Winter Sonata? *triple blushed*

 

After the event, we become closer to each other. Like he had promised, he will not bring out the question until I’m ready with an answer. I am grateful that he is a considerate man.

 

Well, it wasn’t too long for the question to pop up again. The time had finally revealed itself. I know I should make the decision, sooner or later. Well, to be or not to be? To accept or not to accept. To love, or not to love?

 

The state of dilemma could only last for another night before a life-change-decision was made, finally.

 

To be continued - with the ‘second proposal’.

 

Heart shaped candles

 

P/s: I want to write a complete love story of mine in one post. However, it seems that I’m too enjoying myself with writing it like a novel.

P/s/s: The real fact is that I am actually busy with my work. I could only spend little time each day online. So, ya.. here is my Part 2. Like Calvin has expected, there will be Part 3 on his second confession. Stay in love my dear readers ♥

A Love Story Of Mine [Part 1]

“Hi Kelly, I wonder what will be ur response if I ask u for a tea?”, a conversation box suddenly popped up while I was surfing my Facebook page.

*update*

The above phrase has been edited after being corrected by le boyfriend. Well, he knew what he had typed best =P 

It was an invitation from a friend, named Calvin Seet and it was his second time asking me out. Initially, I was kind of reluctant because we have not seen each other though we chatted many times in the past 3 years to discuss about Facebook games and casual chatting. It took me some times to decide before I replied him something similar like this, “Hi Calvin. That will be great :)”.

 

My love story begins from this food itself.

 

I mean, we had finally met up at a mall (Midvalley) on a Friday evening and dined at Pasta Zanmai for dinner. We chatted throughout the dinner but unconsciously, it turned out to be more like a counseling session =.=!!

 

I couldn’t blame myself for switching on my Counselor’s Cap while having dinner with a new friend because that was how my brain had been trained when I interned as a Counselor for 5 months. Plus, he first appeared as a stranger to me and the conversation was basically about his stress at work. So, that’s what happened. Haha.. what a funny first met up.

 

The met up was pretty normal and I was glad to make another new friend. He seems sincere and genuine. Besides, he is willing to share his experiences so that they could help me in my career in future. So, I thought it will be great to put him into my friend list.

 

We did not contact each other after that for about a week or so. Both of us were silent until we chatted again in Facebook. He confessed that he felt I was too polite and courteous. As a result, he thought he was rude comparing to me.

 

It was all because of my shyness and ‘professionalism’ (as a counselor) I guess. Lol.. He remembered how I wouldn’t eat when he was talking, how I cut my pizza into small small pieces, how I munched slowly and how I dropped my right earring, took it and waited to put it back onto my ear when he was not noticing. When I read all these details, I screamed to myself, “HE KNEW every little detail no matter how much I tried not to appear obvious!!! What kind of person is he?”

 

Then, we laughed together at our silliness and continued being friends ;)

There was a time where I asked if I could call him Calv instead of Calvin because I have too many friends with the name of Calvin, Cavin, Kelvin and Kevin. He agreed and even changed his Facebook name into the name I suggested – even till now.. *happily blushed*

 

We went for a second time of dinner in the second week of July June and this time, I could sense something was different between us. We were more natural to each other, laughed out loud to each other jokes (basically to his because he had a good collection of funny grandma’s jokes which were very entertaining), no more work sharing stuff (as he didn’t want my counselor persona to come out again) and enjoyed our meal.

 

Guess what, we spent 3 hours and 10 minutes before we finished our food and drink. I couldn’t believe it until today! I know I am a slow-munching-eater but I had never ate for so long! There should be a free ice-cream for each of us but we had forgotten to take it. Or else, we might take another 1 hour to finish it =P

 

Ever since the second meet up, we become closer to each other. We sms-ed, emailed, facebooked, chatted on the phone and met up more frequently. He even invited me to his hometown, Malacca and offered himself to be a local tour guide. Since I was on my ‘graduation holiday mode’, I took his offered and invited my best buddy whom I’d never travelled far before.

 

It was a fun trip and I enjoyed the time where the three of us spent together. We went for good local food and places we had never visited before. A big thanks to Calv.

  Took this at a private beach on a window glass.

 

After the Malacca trip, he invited me for another outdoor activity but this time, he did not want to tell me the location till the day itself. He said, he wanna surprise me. So, I accepted and soon found out that we were heading to Pulau Ketam as soon as we were in the car. I didn’t know why I was so daring enough to accept his surprises but one thing for sure, I trust him from the very beginning.

 

So, we went together and had another wonderful, funny time together. To my amazement, he did research on everything, including the ferry operating time, tourist spots, type of food and duration of journey before we set off to the island. I am touched with his effort and feel safe somehow. Like, I knew he wouldn’t eat people.. haha XD

 

 

From the Pulau Ketam outing, I’ve learned more about him. He was pretty humorous guy who can make you cried while laughing. LOL…

 

However, I did not know that he can be romantic because after that Pulau Ketam 1 day trip, on the very same day, he invited me for a dinner. He said that he will bring me somewhere nice. He was sure that I will enjoy the place and snapped a lot of pictures because, he said “You’re a blogger. I am sure you would want to blog about that ambience place'”. Besides, he even asked me to wear something nice and comfortable before fetching me back home from Pulau Ketam.

 

Now, to think about it.. it was actually part of the excuses lor because….

    At Bumbu Bali, Puchong

 

He confessed his feeling to me and ‘proposed’ me to be his girlfriend with a bouquet of beautiful pink and purple roses on his hand while waiting at the staircase. He PROPOSED!!!?? No! I mean, the way he gave me the flowers and his opening words sounded like a proposal.

 

At one point, I was thinking, “Today is Valentine Day kah? No… My Birthday? No..”. Seriously, I had never expected anything more than a friend (or so soon) because, well.. we knew about each other just nearly a month and I didn’t know my feeling yet.

 

I didn’t know how to respond to his unexpected confession when both hands of mine were holding his flowers while he was confessing his feeling to me, accompanied by a list of sentimental English songs. All I knew was my face turned out to be hot as a result of over-blushing effect >.<

 

In the end, I was some sort of ‘rejected’ him because… I was in dilemma and I wasn’t sure if I am ready for a relationship. Plus, I was seriously shocked! I had never expected such a romantic scene would ever happened to me and I wasn’t prepare for it. Things were so normal when we were at Pulau Ketam few hours ago, and things were 360 180 degree changed when the night took charge.

 

I told him how I felt and he understood and gave me time to think about him before the night almost ended.

 

 

 

Again, I went back home with serious heart-pounding and pinkish cheeks effects with 12 roses on my hand – but happy with the time we had spent together.

 

To be continue.

Love Saves Me From Fears

Lately, I am constantly being attacked by the feeling of fears and worries which I could not control by the brain. I have tried to use all the knowledge which I’ve learned from Law Of Attraction, but then.. it fails somehow. Well, I truly know why because my mind was tired and often it was distracted with my pessimistic thoughts.

 

I am facing crisis with my work at this moment. Some students started misbehaving in the class while at the same time I am handling the overloading of paperwork. Probably these are what causing me to feel lost at the moment. Teaching is really not an easy job (but with faith, it can be a rewarding one). I didn’t know how to handle till yesterday, I decided to take a break and place myself into another perspective – so that I can see another angle of the problem.

    Decided to nurture my inner child with Baby Panda on my hand ;)

 

Well, things are better when I decided to nurture myself while finding a good solution over my fears. However, my effort was not as strong as gaining the support from loved ones, especially from my partner. The power is overwhelming and it reduces the fear in me almost immediately when Calv insisted to call and discuss over my issue.

 

Although, the conversation didn’t solve much of my problem, but the feeling of knowing someone is always there and care for me cure the frightening heart. Thank you dear. I’m blessed to have you.

 

 

So, things are much better when I woke up this morning, breathing in the fresh air while listening to the bird chirping happily. I am happy that I am still alive and able to witness the beauty of mother’s earth in the town area. Besides, I am thankful that I could still plant some seeds in people and make a little different in their lives (I know I have and will still doing it).

 

Don’t worry about me folks. It is just another adventure of mine when my roller coaster is moving down. I am sure it will come up again in no time and do another 360 turns that will catch your heart and scream in excitement for me.. So ya, just stay with me and see what I am capable of to make your heart goes wild with my experiences *confident* ;)

 

Oh.. by the  day, I have already drafted a story that related to this picture. Didn’t manage to finish the post beautifully, so I decided to postpone it to another inspiring evening (or midnight).

 

 

Probably will share it by tomorrow morning. Have a good Tuesday my dear friends. Visit me again!

Daddy, I Love You.

I have never felt that I’m a filial daughter.
Not once, as much as I could remember.

 

Checked from Oxford Dictionary:

Filial - adj. connected with the way children behave towards their parents

 

I had never shown my affection towards my parents, especially to my dad because I was not taught to be so since I was small. The only way I show love is through scolding, anger, passiveness and spending weekend/holiday together – as that are what my parents’ generation believe in. Besides, he is in the opposite gender – basically he is a male. Duh.

 

Picture was taken last week. Brought my dslr along but without memory card. It was my greatest disappointment of the day because I couldn’t snap their pictures except using phone #failed daughter.

Hence, I grown up and become a very shy person when it comes to expressing myself to someone whom I’ve never said to, “I miss you. I love you dad. I can’t live without you. I like what you did for me. You’re my hero. Thank you dad for everything”. Why? Because, it sounds terribly weird when you’d never appeared to be sentimental and you suddenly become one. Don’t you think so?

 

It’s just weird.. *enough emphasizing the weird word*

 

When I was small, I remembered I did make cards for my parents every single event such as birthday, mother’s day, father’s day and parents’ anniversary with my heart-shape handmade card, sticky man and wrong spelling wishes (my mum still kept some of them. now when i see them, i feel so shy and dumb. lol..).

 

I wrote ‘love you’ all over the place and sometimes I will write a sincere sentence, asking for forgiveness if I’d ever done something hurtful and wrong (especially when I was hopeful that my mum will stop canning me =P). Well, how did a 5 year old girl learnt to write such words? If I remembered it correctly, it learned this ‘skill’ from my kindergarten teachers. Or, because my friends taught me so? Can’t really remember.

 

The moment right after my mum or dad read the letter or card, I will pretend nothing ever happened. There was no card sent. There was no such message. There was no such drawing from me. My parents will treat me differently for a day and I was so happy but I was too shy to show my feeling. So, I pretended and be cool till parents became scary again.. >.<

 

P/s: That’s why, I teach myself to express my love and affection (learned from Counseling and Psychology classes) to my partner and best friends at early stage so that the words will flow fluently and meaningfully throughout the years. I don’t want to be like my parents and the older generation who are not being expressive in saying loving and caring words.

 

Because I am the only child in the family. So, both of my parents treat me very strictly (not so much on dad part). I understood that they want the best for me so that I’ll have a smooth, happy life. Thus, my parents will try their best to protect me. At times, I became rebellious and put a deaf ear on their advices especially during in my teenage period. Well, we did right? Don’t you deny :)

 

 

Even till today, I still pretended that I don’t care much for them because….. It is just hard for me to say, ‘Mum, dad.. I love you’.. OMG! It kills me to say directly to them because my face and ears will turn all red and the heat will cause me fever. Ok lah.. maybe I’m too exaggerate my sentence but really, I can’t..

 

But recently, there is one thing which I am very proud of myself – is when I’m capable to bring my parents to quality and expensive place for good food and atmosphere using my own earning. The feeling is like wanting to shout out to the world and say that, “I am capable to bring my mum and dad for good food with my own sweat money”.

In Chinese, ‘sweat money’ means hard earn money.

 

I celebrated their wedding anniversary at Chocolate Lounge and Father’s Day at Bavarian Bierhuas. Of course, it is not the price that matter. It is the quality time that we spent together while looking at their touching eyes. Probably they’re thinking that, “My daughter has finally grown up and she is proven not stingy!”. On the other hand, I am touched as well because my parents will still care for my wallet and they tried to order the cheapest drink and meal available on the menu *I’m so lucky*.

  

Dad with his signature expression XD

 

A simple joy and happiness are gained from the experience though after the nights, I still treated them normally. I hope, they know that at least I do care for them although I don’t express myself verbally.

And, I have never expected them to read this post (because they don’t have a clue about my blog), especially my dad as this post is dedicated for him on this very special Father’s Day celebration.

 

Happy Father’s Day daddy.
You’re the best dad in the world. I love you.

 

 

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This post is inspired by this videoclip. It is a Thai commercial and I find it real touching and meaningful. To all the daddy out there, Happy Father’s day. To all the son and daughter, love your parents. Don’t be like me. Express more of yourself whenever you can <3

 

P/s/s: I always like Thai commercial clip. There are so creative!

P/s/s/s: Mum, don’t worry. I love you too.

Dear, I……

Ok.
I did what I was not suppose to do again.
Sigh….

 

I lost my phone for the 2nd time again in my life, minus 2 times being stolen. I swore I was being very careful… But, sigh.. This time, it dropped at the garden when I was busy shooting photo with Jane. I guess, it fell off from my tight pocket unconsciously. We both tried very hard to search around the suspected area, even talked to the workers but the result was expected.

 

I don’t think I deserve to use a mobile phone anymore. Probably I should just live a primitive life *smack myself*

 

One of the hardest moments is not to live without a mobile phone (I am living such a life now till I got back my number) but to inform le petit ami, (boyfriend in French) about the lost of his handphone.

 

My nervous system had already played its roles when the decision to inform the boyfriend came into my mind (surprisingly not to mum or dad anymore). I was imagining such a reaction:

 

*****

 

Me: Dear… Could I tell you something?
Calv: Yes my dear?

Me: Do you know you have such a charming smile?
*using the art of language I learned from Psychology*

Calv: Everyone knows that *smile*

Me: And, can I tell you another thing?

Calv: You can tell me anything, of course. What is it? *smile*

Me: Promise you will not be angry? *gulp*

Calv: I’ve told you that you can tell me anything right?  Tell me lah~

Me: Oohh.. Ok.. I have lost your handphone at the garden today. I… am.. sorry..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Calv: Say again?

.

.

*****

 

Those negative thoughts had conquered my mind and I could feel my heart beating furiously when the phone call received by le boyfriend. I have decided to bare the consequences so I am ready for the ‘say again’ moment.

 

To my surprise, he took it calmly and didn’t show any disappointment or anger towards the lost of his favorite phone. He even consoled me but at the same time advicing me not to use handphone anymore. Lol.. I’m joking. He advice me not to buy expensive phone in future.

 

I think I should. Or get an old phone like the bottle like one so that it is easily spotted when it dropped again. I guess, no one would be interested to stole such a bulky-out-dated-phone. Haha..

 

I am lucky to have such a caring and forgiving partner. This has reminded me about Dr. Randy Pausch on The Last Lecturer when he has reminded us that, “People are more important than things”. There is no need to hurt a person when you know the thing can be replaced. This is exactly what has been reflected through Calv’s action. I am thankful to both my boyfriend and God. I have learned something through the lost of the phone and the way he handle an issue.'

 

Still, a fruitful day for me… =)